Page 9 - Chehalis Tribal Newsletter - October 2014

Domestic Violence Awareness Month October 2014 By Charlene R. Abrahamson, Director of Behavioral Health In a Presidential Proclamation, person. Nor should it be an ego type of reaching her and destroying her accomplish. I’m probably a little more President Obama declared October of one-upmanship about your own letter, calling from where I could not relaxed than my grandmothers, who 2014 Domestic Violence Awareness story being more diffcult. I mention be seen or overheard and she bought would want me to pull out the ironing Month. In this document he stated these because I have seen this occur me a plane ticket. My dear friend board more often than I do. several things including: and have educated many trainees was not paranoid or wrong; he was along the way. There’s a reason this so watchful and would have found So that’s part of my story, which may “Domestic violence affects every is a component of learning to be a her letter and other details. He left have had a few different twists if I had American. It harms our communities, counselor. One thing I have taught for the day and I went to the airport, the same resources around that are weakens the foundation of our Nation, those I’ve supervised along the taking only what I could bring. I have available today. Our society appears and hurts those we love most.” way is to ask yourself: “What’s the no idea how long I would have been to have learned to keep things less “Today, as 1 out of every 10 teenagers purpose?” stuck if not for her, or even if I would secret and have more resources. You can come to our Domestic Violence are physically hurt on purpose by If the purpose of telling your story be here, because he did like weapons. program and work with Bridgette someone they are dating, we seek is because it always gets a reaction, Over the years, many friends and Brittain, or access Mental Health and to once again profoundly change or this is a great story, or I like the family have said and thought: “Oh Chemical Dependency services. Don’t our culture and reject the quiet sound of my own voice, or simply not you’re so fancy” so that I cannot be in keep secrets that should not be kept, tolerance of what is fundamentally listening, then I encourage healers to recovery, or have ever been an addict, don’t protect the abusers, seek out the unacceptable.” stop and listen to their client. If the or have been in any abusive situations. support you deserve. We are planning “Nearly two out of three Americans purpose is maybe it helps a person tell But, usually this is a way to try and a Purple Thursday event for October 15 years of age or older know a victim their story, or breaks through some demean you and get you to either use 2014. Keep an eye out for details. of domestic violence or sexual assault, resistance, or it demonstrates hope, again, or not confront them about Bridgette can be reached at and domestic violence homicides then be quick and succinct and see changing. I am lucky that I was able 360-709-1874 claim the lives of three women every if it’s successful - if not, stop. In my to have such an amazing friend, to or bbrittain@chehalistribe.org day.” case, it is a very sparing tool. Also, I eventually get out of that relationship know that as a Native, we can often and to be well into recovery before If you prefer, or it’s more convenient, “Our Nation’s success can be judged guess at each other’s stories and my kids arrived. One important lesson you can call the National Domestic by how we treat women and girls, be very accurate in what we likely is also not to take things personally. Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE and we must all work together to end experienced growing up. My purpose People come with many hurts and are or visiting domestic violence.” is hopefully a message of hope and often scared – I remember this when www.TheHotline.org. Of course, many in our state will have commitment to Native communities things are said in anger. I would rather The link to Russell Wilson’s article: also heard about Russell Wilson’s constantly changing for the better. keep the door open than keep any http://www.theplayerstribune.com/ efforts with Pass the Peace and his Like the statistics in the Presidential grudge or take something to heart. In lets-talk-about-it/ own article recounting his time as a Proclamation, I saw violence long working with adolescents they would The link to the Presidential bully and how he changed his attitude before age 15, I was assaulted as often ask me why I would dress nice, and life. It’s great with the NFL news a toddler, and as a teen. I was in a protect others, do healthy things like Proclamation: http://www. lately around domestic violence that violent relationship. It was, and is, hiking and so on, I would tell them whitehouse.gov/the-press- perhaps some positive changes and surprising to me that men did not that I took pride in working with them offce/2014/09/30/presidential- education can emerge. He says: “The step in to help nor acknowledge it, and for them. So I will always model proclamation-national-domestic- more that we choose not to talk about even when it was in the room next to what I learned from my grandmothers violence-awareness-month-201 it, the more we shy away from the them. As I look back, I can see that I and what I knew they could also issue, the more we lose.” felt alone, hopeless, that no one else OCTOBER 23 Telling our stories is arguably the would have me, that I was in love and most healing undertaking to begin that’s how I saw love demonstrated JOIN THE PURPLE THURSDAY a path toward a life free of this with some family growing up, that CHALLENGE FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. violence. From individual healing, the I was stupid and had nowhere else COMPASSION LOOKS GOOD ON community also begins to heal. I do to go. I fnally told a friend who EVERYONE. not always talk about my own story lived hundreds of miles away and Tsapowum Chehalis Tribal Behavioral Let’s end Domestic and with recovery in many facets of my she was one of the relationships Health Department’s Domestic Dating Violence…Open life, because as a counselor part of I saw modeled as normal. In fact Violence Program invite the men in your heart for survivors. your training includes not disclosing when I tried to intervene for her, he the community to show their support Recognize the signs and help all your own personal struggles. For threatened me. She was out of the by wearing your purple socks. The BREAK FREE. the most part I agree with this, relationship by then, thankfully, and socks will be available at the Tribal GRANT# 2012-TW-AX-0043 CHEHALIS because never should an individual knew what to do. Her advice seemed Center from 8:00 AM – 12:00 PM (or TRIBAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE seeking support feel as though they a little paranoid, but she was exactly until gone) and wear them on Purple ADVOCATE: BRIDGETTE BRITTAIN: 360- have to take care of their support right. She made me memorize details Thursday. 709-1874. bbrittain@chehalistribe.org chehalistribe.org  greatwolfodge.com  luckyeagle.com  eagleslandinghotel.net Page 9